Alone and Sick

Today was especially hard. Mrs. Zebra would help me out on days like this. I honestly dont know how I even made it to work and home. On days like today, she would drive me to work or I would get enough support that I could barely make it in, and would let me relax when I got home. I fell out of bed this morning. I literally had to crawl to my steroids and take some. My memory decided to elude me and I couldnt find my cane. It was in the car. The last week, Ive been on a steroid high, my adrenals working overtime. They are gone now; empty. Drove like 10 under the speed limit all the way to work, after running late as it was. Just couldnt get going. I hurt constantly, but worse now. Depression really does hurt. After work, I had to pick up an Rx so I stopped by the store on the way home. It took me an hour to pick up a frozen pizza, and my Rx. All the electric carts were taken. My brain fog was in full effect as I wondered the 20°F parking lot for nearly 20 min, because I couldnt remember where I parked. Turns out I passed it twice, once being when I exited the store. I called my dad today, and he just told me to "get over" my illness. Because brain tumors are easy to ignore, right?

I usually cheerfully take these trials on, knowing my sweetheart is home waiting to hug me. I have no reason to live now. Why fight?

What is the point?

Depressed and in pain Zebra. 


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